I sphinx it's a pyramid

I (Martha) strayed once again from the book into, as Mr Graham would say, "avant garde" territory today, to welcome back a much-missed member of our team, Wilson.

Since Wilson returned today from her Egyptian holiday, the really happy frood in our team convinced me (after a brief debate about the differences between iced vovos and strawberry mallow biscuits which ended in my defeat) to construct a pyramid in celebration.

What the frood didn't realise though was that I have no spatial awareness and don't do too well with shapes, either. Or carving/sculpture. Luckily, the frood has a slightly more impressive cranial capacity than Martha so was able to not only find a template, but do the legwork.

I mixed up the biggest fuck off cake mixture I've ever seen - 8 eggs, 500g butter and practically a whole bag of sugar and flour. I decided at the last minute to make a rainbow cake, so I divided the mixture into three parts, coloured one part pink and flavoured it with strawberry essence, the other with cocoa and I left the other plain. I had to bake it in two deep square tins, and it took ages. So much for an early Sunday night!

I left the cakes to cool overnight and in the meantime, crushed up two packets of scotch finger biscuits to use as sand and packed two cans of frosting of death, colouring, a bread knife, a box of matches and a little bag of cocoa (for the bricks).

The frood and I set to work as soon as we got in in the morning, with the frood starting out with carving while I mixed up some sand-coloured (kinda) icing:

The first cut is the deepest... BABY*

 
 The two cakes were stacked on top of each other, then the frood carved down the sides at the precise angle of 51 degrees (well, it would have been precise if we'd remembered the protractor) and fashioned some of the off-cuts into a peak. I then bollixed that up by frosting it too enthusiastically and making it slump >:

I used the first can of frosting-of-death to dirty ice the pyramid after we spackled it together, before covering it in the sand coloured mixture. The frood arranged the "sand" (crumbs) on the iced board while I made brick lines using the ole matchbox-dipped-in-cocoa trick (thanks, AWW!).

Work in progress:

And then the frood found a little green army man and Blunt Angel found another, and we had ourselves a diorama. Add in King Kong to the scene and it became nothing like an Egyptian pyramid but it was still pretty fun - and I think quite tasty.

The final product:

*that one's for you, LVV.